Batman Returns (1992)

Keaton & Burton reteam, adding in Danny DeVito's Penguin and Michelle Pfeiffer's Catwoman.

Sucks:

When Batman yanked off his mask, he had to rip the latex. How did he put it on? (Joe Crowe)

Sentient, missile-toting penguins. Stooooopid. And that little gaffe was just enough for Schumacher to get his pointy-toed shoe in the door. . . . (Mark Finn)

Bloated backstory for the Penguin which ends up hamstringing him as an effective villain. (Peggy Hailey)

An unforgivable wasting of the villainous potential of Christopher Walken. (Peggy Hailey)

That critics and audiences complained that this movie was too scary, unpleasant, and dark. It's Batman, people! (Jason Myers)

For a movie overloaded with backstory, nothing ever happens. (Peggy Hailey)

A plot would've been nice. (Jayme Blaschke)

The gross-out take on the Penguin wasn't edgy. It was simply repulsive. (Jayme Blaschke)

For two movies now, the "Dark Knight Detective" hasn't done much detecting. He's simply reacting to the bad guys and playing with his technology. Incorrectly. Remember when he did that little scratchin' thing . . . with a CD? Goofball. (Mark Finn)

I didn't buy Catwoman's origin. She survived the fall because she survived the fall? Uh, OK? I guess? It's the first hint of the supernatural in a series that has tried very hard to rationally explain everything so far. It felt stilted. (Mark Finn)

As much as the Bat-signal shining on Bruce Wayne sitting in the darkness brooding rocked, his first appearance in costume in the movie stunk. Instead of an ominous shadow falling across the bad guys or somesuch, we get Batman behind the wheel of a car, driving. It was intense driving, though. Man, those hands were GRIPPING that wheel! (Joe Crowe)

First, no one should ever utter the word "poontang" unless it is used ironically to ridicule people who use the word "poontang"; and even then — no. Second, Danny DeVito, in particular, should never ever EVER be allowed to utter the word "poontang." Thirdly, if it were completely unavoidable that Danny DeVito should utter the word "poontang," he should, under no circumstances, be permitted to say it while wearing a hideous prosthetic nose and drooling a black oily substance. Ick! (Jason Myers)

Rocks:

The defeated Penguin being carried away by penguins. (Joe Crowe)

Tim Burton's Gotham had become familiar by this movie, but there was still a balance between over-the-topness and dour reality. You hear that, Schumacher? Balance! (Joe Crowe)

Despite the shaky origin, Pfeiffer's Catwoman was beautiful and sexy (if just a touch too dominatrix-esque for me). And DeVito's Penguin was creepy and terrifying. The freak angle played well with him. (Mark Finn)

Catwoman, Catwoman, Catwoman. How could any studio exec see this film and think, "Hey! Halle Berry!" (Jayme Blaschke)

Catwoman, baby! Michelle Pfieffer hits all the right notes in this one, and her damaged, borderline-schizophrenic Catwoman is a perfect complement to Keaton's damaged, borderline-schizophrenic Batman. (Peggy Hailey)

Fantastic character development and interplay. Batman actually gets some personality this time around. (Jayme Blaschke)

If the first movie was all about the Joker, this one's all about Catwoman, second-coolest Batman villain. The transformation of Selina Kyle from mousy to catty. The way Selina breaks her cheery "HELLO THERE" sign so it reads "HELL HERE". The way Catwoman says "Meow." The way she licks Batman's face. And the way Michelle Pfeiffer looks in that catsuit? Purrrrfectly, clawfully cattractive.

"I don't know about you, Miss Kitty, but I feel so much . .. yummier." (Jason Myers)

Abandoned zoo. Every major city needs at least one abandoned zoo, preferably located between the abandoned movie studio and abandoned amusement park. (Jayme Blaschke)

Nice Paul Reubens cameo as the Penguin's father. (Peggy Hailey)

The ambiguous ending of the Batman/Catwoman portion of the story. It's a shame no one has explored this relationship further. (Peggy Hailey)

An attempt to make the hackneyed convention of Comic Book Talking During A Fight Scene work. Catwoman's kicks were breaks in the sentences. Not bad. It was a nice try at working actual source material into the movies. (Mark Finn)

"Mistletoe can be deadly if you eat it."

"But a kiss can be deadlier . . . if you mean it."

"Oh God, does this mean we have to start fighting now?"

One of the best all-time comic book moments in the history of super hero movies. Prove me wrong; I dare you. (Mark Finn)

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