It's the thought that counts. So here's what we think are excellent Christmas presents for us. We mean, folks like us that you have to buy for. But you can buy these for us, too. No, really.
Hollywood Quality Gorilla Suit
No, I'm not kidding. Do I look like I'm kidding? Look, when other people get rich, they buy cars, boats, and get boob jobs. When I get rich (or when Santa gets rich, either way), I'm GETTING this suit. I ain't playing. The suit itself looks kinda like George Barrows, but the head is all Crash Corrigan. Dig it, baby.
Heritage Auctions Movie Poster Catalogs for one year
Why on Earth would anyone want that, you ask? Well, it's like this, see: Heritage Auctions is a geek's paradise, what with the movie poster and comic book and rare art auctions that they hold every week. So much cool, unique stuff zips through that place that it's hard to keep up. So, these catalogs cost a pretty penny, but guess what? Your order comes with a $100 voucher good towards any one of their movie poster auctions! Which means you just bought your favorite geek a *really* nice The Empire Strikes Back one-sheet (or his/her favorite Ray Harryhausen poster).
Avalon Hill Boardgames
A classic Christmas gift with a neo-geek twist! Everyone knows about Axis & Allies, but Avalon Hill has redone most of their classic games with slick graphics and pieces. On top of that, there's a bevy of way-cool boardgames for anyone interested in genre stuff, from horror movies to giant monsters, from warfare in the distant past to the far-flung future, there's something here for the Geek-In-Training everywhere. Me, I'm gunning for Sword & Skull or Nexus Op!
Red Sleeve Fungo Shirt from Ebbet's Field
I love this place. Ebbet's Field specializes in authentic sports wear from the golden age of baseball and football. Everything they do is historically accurate, and their shirts and products are top quality. It's Vintage, only Obscure (at least for our skiffy world).
Shelves from IKEA
Price: $25 and up
Medical studies have shown that geeks buy things. Most of those things need to be put somewhere, and what better place than shelves from IKEA?
There's so many different kinds to choose from, and with so many accessories like recessed lighting, clear glass doors, etc, that you're better off getting a gift card or two and letting me go to town.
My books aren't getting any smaller, Jack. Help a brother out with this.