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Stormtrooper Lawsuit Rocks Empire

Lucasfilm and a prop designer are having a legal slap-fight over Stormtrooper armor. Andrew Ainsworth manufactured the helmets for the first movie in 1977. Ainsworth says he owns the armor design copyright, and his lawyers say he should get $24 billion in back pay for Stormtrooper use. Ainsworth sells replicas. Lucasfilm says "Nuh-uh," and wants him to quit it.

Lucas has more than $24 billion in his wallet at any given time, but he's saving up so he can buy Venus.

Harry Potter Lawsuit Rocks Hogwarts

J.K. Rowling says she fought off suicidal thoughts. It turns out that 780 trillion bucks is a sure cure for that. Now she's givingsomeone else depression: the would-be creator of a Harry Potter encyclopedia that she wants to not be published. The judge says they should reach a settlement. Come on, Rowling. Just give the guy a solid gold yacht or two and be done with it.

The dude cried during the trial. Makes Rowling feel like a big man, I bet.

Flash Cartoon Becomes Thing You Have To Pay For

Homestar Runner will be a game for the Wii, made by Telltale Games, who do Bone and Sam and Max Freelance Police games. The Flash comedy cartoon Homestar Runner launched in 2000, back when Flash cartoons took 16 hours to download, and watching a two-minute cartoon took 45 minutes.

BSG Creator To Do Something About Something

Ron Moore is signed to do a sci-fi movie trilogy. That's all it says in Variety. We can infer there will be three movies. We can also break the news that they will be science fiction related.

That is just lazy. Every time some slap-assed project that might never get off the ground gets a press release, we get a name and a comparison that it's like some movie we know crossed with some other movie we know. We deserve that. Man, we need it. How do they expect us to be furious?

Honey, They Shrunk Reason To Go See This Movie

So you might say, "I'd like to see a remake of Incredible Shrinking Man, because classic sci-fi movies aren't new enough for me." Director Brett Ratner will help you out with that, just like Mr. Keanu Reeves is doing us a solid with Day the Earth Stood Still.

Thanks, new people! We'll have our positive recollection of those old movies wiped away in no time.