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One morning Billy spoke. His mother was lifting a spoon of cereal to his lips when Billy said, "I can do that myself, thank you." Billy's mother dropped the spoon. After her heart stopped racing, she managed to say, "Why, Billy--you've learned to talk." "That's obvious, isn't it, Mother?" said Billy. Billy's mother was so mesmerized by the sight of his moving lips that she failed to notice that the squawky voice was emerging from the top of Billy's head. Of course, it was the parrot speaking while the rat and the spider in concert caused Billy's lips to move with expert probes into his primitive gray matter. The trio had been practicing for some days past while alone, and now had complete mastery over Billy's body. Billy now picked up the fallen spoon from the tabletop and began to feed himself. Without visual feedback, the controlling trio made a mess. Still, to his mother the achievement was miraculous. After eating, Billy said, "I'd like to go out now, Mother, but I need a hat." Billy's mother found an old fedora of her husband's and placed it on Billy's head, without looking in. "Thank you. Have a good day at work, Mother." Billy's mother left the house in a stupefied way. When she was gone, the rat chewed two small holes in the hat so the parrot could look out to guide them. "Left, right, around the chair, grab the doorknob, now straight ahead down the walk." The adventurers in their stolen puppet set out to explore the world. Downtown, the trio walked Billy up and down the commercial district. They found it vastly stimulating to masquerade as a human. They felt instantly superior to all their kind, having gained entry to the world of humanity. The two animals and the arachnid found themselves after some time outside the very hospital where Billy had been born. They stopped to contemplate the building, feeling some strange kinship with it, though they had no idea of its true significance. At that moment the Doctor who had delivered Billy--and given him yearly examinations since--stepped out the door. When he saw Billy standing there, he scrabbled at his chest and fell to the ground. People began to scream and cluster around the Doctor. The parrot got nervous and said, "Quick! We must go back to the house!" They hurried home. When Billy's father met his wife at the door that evening, he was soon informed of the startling change Billy had undergone. News of Billy's delayed maturation did not seem to alarm Billy's father as much as it had his wife. Perhaps this was because he was learning of it secondhand. "Well," said Billy's father, "I guess we were mistaken when we said our son would never turn out to be anyone special." "It appears we were," agreed Billy's mother. "Where is he now?" "In his bedroom. He's been there since he came back from his walk." "Well, let's bring Billy out to share supper with us. We're a real family now." The table was laid, steaming food was brought from the kitchen, and Billy was summoned. The inhabitants of Billy's skull had been hiding with Billy in his room ever since their precipitous return from their first excursion abroad. They had been rather alarmed by the human world, especially the confusion at the hospital. Now, though, they mastered themselves enough to bring Billy's body to the table when called. "Hello, Father," said the parrot from within Billy's head. Its voice was somewhat muffled by the fedora through which it peeked. Billy's father did not seem to care or notice. He looked inordinately proud. "Hello, Billy. I heard you gave your mother quite a shock today. But that's all water over the dam. Let's eat." The rat and the spider manipulated Billy's synapses, causing him to sit. With the parrot issuing directions, the trio was able to feed Billy more efficiently than earlier in the day. (The parrot's commands to his compatriots, of course, were uttered sotto voce in his natural language. Therefore all Billy's movements were accompanied by a low series of trills and whistles, which Billy's parents chose to ignore.) After their meal, the family retired to the living room to watch television. The animals knew all about television, from having inhabited human households all their lives, and enjoyed watching it when given a chance. Now, with Billy sitting undemandingly, they could take turns at the hat's eyeholes. (The rat and spider were already beginning to feel a little put-upon, forced as they were to labor over Billy's brainstem in the dark beneath the hat.) The local news was on. The lead item was about Billy. First, the Doctor appeared. He had survived his heart attack. He explained that he had been shocked by Billy's appearance in public. An old photo from the hospital's files was shown: baby Billy's empty brainpan. The Doctor claimed that if Billy had really regenerated enough brain tissue to become aware and move about, then it promised great hope for solving all sorts of neurological disorders. No sooner had the doctor faded from the screen than the phone began to ring in Billy's house. It didn't stop all night. |
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